The resume: Sarah Chen
Invented person, real craft
Responsible for managing the team roster.
Built the roster for 22 staff across three sites, cutting unfilled shifts from 11 a month to 2.
Assisted with reporting.
Rebuilt the weekly reporting pack in Power BI, retiring 11 manual spreadsheets and saving a day a week.
Why it works: every bullet runs verb, then scope, then consequence. "Responsible for" describes being nearby while work happened; the rewrite names what you built, how big it was, and what changed because of it, so the claim can be checked and believed.
Both rewrites are the sentence formula from How to Write a Resume ($9). Its finished worked example is Sarah Chen's one-page resume, with every structural decision numbered and explained.
The cover letter: Renee Walcott
Invented person, real craft
I am writing to apply for the position of Operations Coordinator as advertised on Seek. I am a highly motivated and results-driven professional with over ten years of experience in the logistics industry and a proven track record of success in fast-paced environments.
Your ad leads with daily freight scheduling across a 25-depot regional network. For the past three years I have done that job one size down. At Corrigan Freight I schedule daily linehaul and regional freight across 12 depots, 140 drivers and about 60 routes a day.
Why it works: the first opener could sit under any ad unchanged, and it tells the reader nothing their shortlist pile has not already said. Renee answers the ad's leading requirement in the ad's own terms, sizes herself against it honestly ("one size down"), and gives the reader numbers to check. Both letters answer the same invented job ad, so the contrast is the method.
Renee's full letter, annotated line by line beside the letters that die, is in The Cover Letter That Gets Read ($9).
The veteran letter: Liam Doyle
Invented person, real craft
Corporal, workshop section second-in-command. Responsible for scheduled maintenance and equipment serviceability in accordance with fleet directives.
As an Army corporal running a workshop section, I planned scheduled maintenance across a 60-vehicle protected mobility fleet and led four tradespeople, and availability climbed from 71 per cent to 88 while we carried it.
Why it works: the rank appears once, and the words directly after it do the translation: running a section, leading four tradespeople. Fleet size and trade count give a civilian employer scope they can price, and the availability figure turns service tempo into the reliability a sustainment employer is actually buying.
Liam's full letter to a defence industry employer is the second annotated letter in The Cover Letter That Gets Read. The ADF Transition Pack ($39) runs the same translation across three services and six destinations.
The edit, sentence by sentence
Four more before-and-afters in the same register: invented specimens of the habits we fix most often.
Responsible for managing social media accounts and posting content.
Grew Instagram from 3,200 to 41,000 followers in 14 months with engagement held at 6.1% against a sector median of 1.9%.
Why it works: managing describes being present, growing describes causing something. The benchmark does the arguing, so the reader does not have to take your word for anything.
Duties included supervising maintenance personnel and ensuring compliance.
Led a section of 8 technicians to 96% fleet availability across 22 vehicles, closing every audit finding inside 30 days.
Why it works: duties included is the language of a position description rather than a person. Team size, asset count and an availability rate let a hiring manager price the job you actually did.
A dynamic team player with excellent communication skills.
Chaired the weekly handover between clinical and administrative teams, cutting missed referrals from 14 a month to 2.
Why it works: the original is unfalsifiable, so it spends the reader's attention and buys nothing. We do not reword filler, we spend the space on the evidence that was hiding behind it.
Assisted with the implementation of new procurement processes.
Drafted the procurement delegation matrix adopted across 4 business units, cutting average approval time from 9 days to 3.
Why it works: assisted with hides your contribution inside someone else's project. Naming the artefact you produced and the change it caused makes the claim yours and checkable.